I have had an amazing evening & day today. I have met with great people, picked up new clients, enjoyed myself at Parramatta Business Chamber tonight, had lots of red wine and then caught up with a colleague and spend some “Single Time” walking through the buzzing Church St / Cafe Precinct of Parramatta CBD (the hub of Western Sydney).
It was less than a month ago where I was engaged, looking after & bonding with a potential step son, eating meals with my new awesome family – and starting to really appreciate fatherhood. In a very rapid turn of events, where I received a “Dear John” type of conversation – I was single yet again (I don’t blame them at all, I am sure I am not the easiest guy to live with for some – and they are great, kind people who made a decision. Good luck to them and they shall be missed!).
After dealing with many painful emotions and sad / long days, about a week ago I started to feel like myself again.
“These are the best of times and the worst of times” rings very true to me. Single I am, just got a new property and not long away from moving to Parramatta. The business is growing great, I have some amazing friends and I may even start “Looking at Women” again not too long from now (lol).
Since being “Newly Single” I have been working out lots, having some great days as well – and been moving on from the “Family Guy” type of mindset, to the “Single Persian Business Man” type of mindset and doing my best to enjoy myself.
For me, the interesting revelations of all this started when I started paying attention to how most people I know have been through heavy / sad breakups of some point. Sure, I had a great family for a while there (and they moved me on which was painful), however many great clients are single / divorced or even happily family people now – having gone through relationship pain earlier.
After being in a heavy family situation and then back on my own again – after the transition, tonight reminded me greatly of when I was 18 – 22 and the days where I worked for the government. It was freeing in not having to report into anyone and also quite liberating in having to only more make decisions for myself.
For me I guessed that at the age of 36, I would be married with children now and still that hasn’t happened – but I am sure one day it will.
Another key revelation that has really impacted me in this experience is just the reality of how fast change can happen in todays world – and “Change Happens” to many. I went from a massive blow of losing my new family, to that of getting a property and watching my own business (and many clients businesses to) expand beyond their wildest dreams. I would be deep down feeling like junk with all that played out, then all of a sudden get a phone call or an email from someone thanking me for helping turn their life / business around.
In a very funny way, I could see how all my painful experiences coalesced into a positive outcome of being smarter, wiser and even eager to start my own family one day and have children and the like. I think in life when we take a massive blow / get left / lose something big it’s quite normal to feel traumatised for a short while. Once that fallout is over, the brain then I think starts to open up and one can be more aware of all the great opportunities out there in the world.
For me, my own journey now has been more one of expansion and searching. Key things going through my mind have been things like “What type of girl will I end up with?”, “What will the new place be like?”, “What massive speaking gigs are coming up?”, “How can I keep up with all these new awesome clients” and many more.
Basically, I am looking forward to new opportunities and my new life has come to hit me with a thud.
My advice? In life, rightly or wrongly – things happen to us. We have good / bad events and I think the trick is doing ones best to steer it to a positive outcome. Many have commented on my strength and ability to overcome many bad things that have happened to me and it’s not because I am wonderful, I think it’s more keeping one’s mind focused on moving on and new things.
If you have lost loved ones close to you for whatever reason, I feel for you! It’s hard, it’s wrong and it shouldn’t have happened. However, it does in this crazy world and the sooner we have appreciate them – put them in the past and look ahead, the better we all shall be.
Thank you for the read! I appreciate your great support and here’s to being a Single 36 year old! How knows which cutey is going to come my way aye? lol
Edward Zia – Marketing Mentor & Single Persian Man x x
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